All Mothers Might Be Jewish Mothers.

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' MOTHER:
"I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call, you didn't write!

MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER:
"A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the walls like the other children? Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?"

NAPOLEON'S MOTHER:
"You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take your hand out of
your jacket and show me!"

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER:
Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER:
"Next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!

THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER:
"Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off already and go to sleep!"

PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER:
"I don't care where you think you have to go, young man, midnight is
long past your bedtime!"

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER:
"Your senior photograph and you couldn't have done something with your hair?"

BILL GATES MOTHER:
"It would have killed you to become a doctor?"

BILL CLINTON'S MOTHER:
"Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl, that Monica.